Wednesday, April 12, 2006

Can’t we all just get along?

I ride a bike. I ride a bike on a bike/walking track.

I go as fast as I possibly can and if you get in my way, tough luck. I’m either going to knock you down or scream at you using obscenities to get out of my way.

My bike is rusted and caked with the blood of innocent pedestrians, small children and stray animals that didn’t get out of my way in time.

I hate all other pedestrians. Especially women with baby strollers. In fact, I hate kids all together and I go out of my way to put their lives in danger when I ride my bike.

I have no soul. I’m a punk. I’m rude, crude and a bad ass dude.

In my world view, people on bike/walk ways should never walk side by side. It should only be single file. And there’s no excuse whatsoever for anyone ever to stray to the wrong side on the path lest I hit them head on as I scream along at breakneck speed.

I hate people and small animals and especially you.

This is how I’m sure people see cyclists on the riverside bike/walkway in the Brisbane city centre. I see people on bikes getting dirty looks from people who are walking or sitting near the pathway. I’ve had streams of abuse thrown at me because people have had to maybe move a little so I could get past.

I don’t ride fast; I don’t try to put people out. I’m patient, I give way, I look out for small kids that may unexpectedly dart in front of me. But still I’m treated like a second class citizen because I (like a handful of others) choose to ride a bike on a pathway that was designed for bikes and people to use.

Can’t we all just get along?

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